Vacation Expectations vs. Vacation Reality

The hubs and I are headed on vacation.

Which means I've officially entered the stage where I can't remember if I packed everything...

Or absolutely nothing.

Does anybody else pack like they're preparing to survive six months in the wilderness...

...for a four-day trip?

Because somehow I always end up with seventeen shirts...

One pair of socks...

And no toothbrush.

Makes perfect sense.

Then there's the packing process itself.

The hubs packs in about twelve minutes.

Throws three shirts in a bag.

A pair of shorts.

Toothbrush.

Done.

Meanwhile...

I've got clothes laid across the bed like I'm opening a boutique.

"This one if it's hot."

"This one if it's cold."

"This one if we decide to go somewhere nice."

"This one in case somebody invites us to dinner."

"This one because it's cute."

"This one because what if I don't like the cute one tomorrow?"

Then I end up wearing the same favorite outfit twice anyway. 🤣

And can somebody explain why we all suddenly become weather experts before vacation?

We're checking three different weather apps...

Looking at hourly forecasts...

Trying to predict humidity levels like we're auditioning for The Weather Channel.

Spoiler alert...

It's still gonna do whatever it wants.

Then comes the drive.

Somewhere around hour two...

One of us says,

"Do you need to stop?"

"No."

Five minutes later...

"Actually..."

Every single trip.

Without fail.

Then there's the GPS.

"In one mile, take Exit 147."

Great.

"Stay left."

Okay.

"Keep right."

Excuse me?

"Merge left."

Ma'am...

Pick a lane.

I'm trying my best.

And heaven forbid you miss the exit.

You'd think you personally offended the GPS.

"Recalculating..."

Yeah...

I can hear the disappointment in your voice.

Calm down, Brenda.

We're gonna get there. 🤣

Hotels are funny, too.

You spend five minutes trying to figure out which light switch controls what.

One turns on the bathroom.

One turns on a lamp.

One apparently contacts NASA.

And somehow the one light you actually need...

Doesn't work.

Then there's the tiny coffee maker.

Who decided one sip counted as a pot of coffee?

I need enough caffeine to deal with vacation traffic.

Not a sample.

And let's not forget the people who somehow walk faster than humanly possible through airports.

If you've ever been passed by a family pulling five suitcases, two toddlers, and a Chihuahua while you're power walking...

You know exactly what I'm talking about.

Vacation is funny.

We spend months looking forward to relaxing...

Then we need another vacation to recover from the vacation.

But honestly...

I wouldn't trade it.

Because years from now...

We're not going to remember whether we packed enough socks.

We're going to remember laughing until our stomach hurt.

Trying new restaurants.

Getting lost together.

Watching sunsets.

Making memories we'll tell over and over again.

Those are the souvenirs that actually matter.

Now if you'll excuse me...

I need to go repack my suitcase for the fourth time.

I'm pretty sure I forgot something important.

Like...

Pants.

🤣

So tell me...

What's the funniest thing that's ever happened to you on vacation?

Or...

Are you a "pack three days ahead" person...

Or a "throw everything in a suitcase thirty minutes before you leave" kind of traveler?

I need to know I'm not alone. 🤣✈️🏖️